Long time no see....! :D

OnePeace..! i was so surprise when i enter our blog. suddently thought of it and i entered.hehe..:D i'm surprised that it's still active..i thought b'sawang2 ody...hahahaha! miss all of you...miss every moments in KML...wish to turn back time...huhuu... by the way...gud luck and all the best for all of you k... we may have changed, but our memories still REMAIN... n our friendship will have no end..:) see you when i see you! FATE will make it.hehehe...

lots of love,
aiwen

A Wonder of Reflection

Dearest H4T31 members,

how are you, it seems that the time had flies fast and in no time, things for me somehow is getting much more real than ever and feel the fantasy that I lived are ever shedding to little pieces like the leaf that slowly shed away with its ever changing season..

For now I'm lonely, sarcastically, should I be this directly in lamenting my dilemma? I guess who cares right?

I feel like want to eat ice kacang and its been a while I haven't went there alone to eat to enjoy the chill of the ice that melts as you tried to hold it in your tongue for few minutes. I've been there quite a number of time when I reach here but as time goes, I have lesser my visits to the ice kacang store..

I haven't been contacting you guys for a long time, should I contact?

I had a query which goes like this:
If you got some friends and each of you haven't contact you due to the reason of buzy (possibly), should you initiate in contacting them or just let it be? Would contacting to them hurt you very much as indicating that you just free and have nothing important to do?

Lastly, A friend said this which I found out quite nice. i feel like saying this to you all.

"Dearest H4T31,

I'm sorry. Please forgive me. I love you. A thanks to you. : ) "

My Feeling 2

I am at Penang now...going to do my intern here until end of november and i ald been having my internship for one week. But suddenly i felt regret for choosing this company as my intership company. First three day, i need to sit in the training room to listen to the talk that not related to my job. Then after i enter my department, i dint do anythings for 1st day. I only asked to update the imformation using excel for the second day and what a bad day i have as i forgot to save my work and of course i need to redo it. And today is my third day in my office. But i dint have any task or work to do. My supervisor throw me to another person in charge and she dint give me any task. It make me become very worry as i need to complete at least one task to get a good result.(I have grade for my intern result and is not count by fail or pass). I really regret now. Just hope that i will be given a task in coming week, before my faculty supervisor come my company to visit me. And one more things, i really miss my friends as i dint have many friends here. I only close with my friend that i knew in matrik and i even dont know what is my new housemates's name. It make me become more and more miss time i have with my friends in UKM. Hope can end my intern ASAP and go back to UKM or my sweet home ASAP......

My Narrative for Today ~ 11/06/2010 ~

Lovely and beautiful enough for today as I listen to this song:

.......... Running down the streets to nowhere
Music is my life-you're my sweetest lightingale
But I can't hear it here no more.........

" I Go " by Peter Teo



That's all for today, my dear H4T31 and readers : )

Dear H4t31 and others readers,

First of all, I would like to thank Yik Kiat on her previous entry on this H4T31 blog title" My feeling". Thank you.

And for this, I now writing about my current situation..though many things happended and i do feel like sharing but for now, time is the essence that all i had..this might be a short post..


********** Brief Sentences **************

It had happened from a feeling, though feel so sad now when I just taken aback today, I was strucked to reality somehow..realizing It just cannot be and I just sadden today when Fawendy come and analysed my dillemma..so frank and so much direct that sentences had come out, and there i was sitting on my chair, numbed for a while..I just can't bear it but its the truth. I guessed i just throw myself on that situation though i didn't analyse it just like what my second mentor reminded me few months ago. She said that don't just jump into the river when you don't know anything, analyse first..Indeed, my feeling had took control and i just dwell without much thought..so now, I'm in vain..



********* Recalling *********

i just checked my email and i browsed all the email that once upon a time i sent to my friend, a friend from H4T32, after reading what i written to him in that email..

I had discovered somehow things had changed..and i try to evaluate those days when i written that message and now..Its diffrent now..really, though i didn't see what coming, but after reding that email, I know that i had lost..lost that part, the very part the set myself i presumed..


*****Written Today In My Diary*****

I've realized now, that no matter how much significant a matter I've made for others or to involved, it seems that I'm just passing in their life. And thus, through many events that followed, people that come along and walk away...everything seems permanentless had been the nature of all human life and perhaps throughout the history of man, forgotten things were lost through the endless passing time and those shared the closest may or might preserved in ones history of life.. I ponder and try to generalized now..the effect of the things i try to installed or immerse myself into theirs, a barrier often come along shielding it..I thus, can only touch the barrier but never penetrate.. I thus, can only watch but never hold.. I thus can only feel but never made an action...
All i know is that i just passing through. Though I'm not complaining, I just sadden by this phenomena... How utterly I am to be hurt by such events that I myself would never think of...
Now i feel it, perhaps i might wrest it away...

My feeling

I really miss my home and yet i cant go home. It's too far and the ticket is too expensive. This feeling become more stronger when i feel tension and got into the trouble. But i feel so lucky i have a lot of friends who are always there when i need them. I really appreciate my friends who help me in the incident yesterday...without them i really don't know what to do.

A Memoir I Saved Last August

Giving what it takes in life and deal with it , it just like this..

Going round and came back to the starting point where you and i were never met, it seem likes an alternate mode of vision, vision of lies whisk lies that hide the facts and truth but only realization may shed light upon it..how much? how often? how? An answered once Socrates said " one thing only i know, and that is that i know nothing."

faith, trust, relationships, feelings are no longer the same, It is moving...Dynamic, i would say so. how it changes within minutes makes human itself a most interesting subject..unknown, full of different views, ways that we never observed often made us flabbergasted. It is confusing enough if we lost in this multitude of ideas generating massive works.

A massive work may mark a whole knowledge that ever existed. From the very beginning till the day we breath are ever increasing in this seeming countless minutes not before the minutes and second to come, new things were enlightened. This particular moment, even when we sleep, though may seen some dream, it is generating the story of dreams where we continue till we awake and vanish as we may even realized it yet new lights generates after the this lost of inquisition.

Road to travel to reach a place , a destination, is still far..I'm now tormented for it...much hopes were depend on conscience of being persistence..In the end how far I've reach? Infinity variables lies along the road, much to be judge is the view from others. Why they generates such impact in ones life as one may just ignore and head thee own way. In the abyss, lies a an unsecured side that overweight our balance and we didn't dare to take what it is ...therefore away for escape , join the crowd and left the pathway that blinded by mist and what we knew from the beginning.. Is that how it is?

A move of consequences forms effect that preserve as well as destruction. We just a mere creatures that has limited spatial existance that we ourself may knew or some may not knew. One interesting that enlighted me is that the diversification of experiences that people choose for themself. Some may just go through as a passer by, other seek oppurtunities at every stage of our sphere that we rooted in for now, while some reborn themself with might that came to challenge against the odd that come..for some reason, I am....retrieve with all the unknows that shattered by the edge, come to an end that conquering may be the answer i need to find but what "realm" shall i mastered it?

Covering unlimited ...

Separate by our naive thoughts ...

Burn by the star ...

Habour our lifes with master pieces ...

Extant of existance...

It still incomplete, somehow it feels like living...

Written it last August, right now I feel like posting it...